Sophie Grégoire on cutting ties and bouncing back from heartbreak

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OTTAWA — Sophie Grégoire said she suffered from chronic stress as a result of threats to Prime Minister Justin Trudeau and her family, and said their split still hurts to this day.

Grégoire, 49, was a guest during a virtual wellness summit called “Bouncing Back from a Broken Heart” on Friday where she discussed the end of her 18-year marriage to Trudeau and how she has been navigating the uncertainty after their separation a year ago.

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During her panel — called “Heal Ourselves, Heal the World” — Grégoire said that while some people might be celebrating their divorce or separation, she is not.

“There’s still so much love and relationship and closeness in our family,” she said. “Even though our relationship is transforming, it doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.

“It hurts so much. Why? Because I had to choose my authenticity over my attachment, and that can be called ‘heartbreak,’ although the heart never breaks.”

Trudeau and Grégoire formally announced their separation in August 2023. In a joint statement published on social media at the time, they said the decision was reached after “many meaningful and difficult conversations.”

The announcement made international headlines and drew comparisons with Trudeau’s father Pierre, the last prime minister to separate while in office.

The National Post revealed last year that Grégoire had already “re-partnered” with an Ottawa pediatric surgeon at the time the split was announced.

Although they now live apart, the Trudeaus have since been co-parenting their three children: Xavier, 17, Ella-Grace, 15, and 10-year-old Hadrien. Pictures on social media show many family dinners and celebrations at Rideau Cottage, their official residence on the grounds of the governor general’s home. The family has also spent vacations together.

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Grégoire said that while marriage is seen as a success, and divorce or separation is seen as a failure, she rejected the idea that Trudeau and she failed in their relationship.

“My kids now are seeing me and my partner… be respectful,” she said. “We’re not perfect. Sometimes we’ll argue, whatever, but we’ll still spend time together, still be respectful, still be loving and tender. It is possible.”

Grégoire said she had to “transform” her relationship with Trudeau and reached for a pair of scissors to illustrate how life taught her to “cut ties in a healthy way.”

“Ouch, ouch, ouch, it hurts,” she said.

“It hurts because in our primitive brains, if you’re discarded from the tribe, you die. So, our primitive brain is playing tricks on us in many ways, but we’re evolving and we’re thinking beings, but before being thinking beings… we are sensing beings.”

Grégoire opened up about the chronic stress that she was suffering as the prime minister’s wife, but she would not go into details because it involved confidential information.

“People have an illusion, a perception of what it means to be in public service and when your personal security, and personal security of your children and of your husband and partner is always at risk, when there is trauma surrounding you… it is chronic stress.”

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She pivoted to an interview she recently did for Elle Ukraine and said while Canada is not at war, some individuals can experience physiological stress symptoms all the same.

“You don’t have to be in a war zone to be able to fall into chronic alert mode,” she said.

When asked how she dealt with the breakup, Gregoire, a certified yoga instructor, said the mat on which she practises her daily yoga and breathing exercises has seen it all.

“That mat, let me tell you, has seen tears of sweat, of confusion, of alert, of sadness, of grief, of trying to let go, of not understanding what’s going on, and of navigating life through a thick fog,” she said.

“I think that we all feel that sometimes we can’t clear the debris of our mind. So, my yoga practice… is to clear the debris.”

At the end of the panel on “Bouncing Back from a Broken Heart,” Grégoire even offered to lead a meditation exercise with the host of the panel and the virtual participants.

Grégoire has been outspoken about the end of her marriage with Trudeau in various interviews and how it still affects her today. On a podcast earlier this year, she said her split from him still “hurts deeply” and that women “shouldn’t expect the minimum.”

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“You should expect a maximum of nourishment, presence and help in your life with the people around you. And we shouldn’t have to hold it all together as women,” she said.

In a separate interview, she said that there is “still so much love” as they navigate their post-separation.

Grégoire, also a mental health and wellness advocate, has been promoting her self-help book Closer Together: Knowing Ourselves, Loving Each Other, and is working on a children’s book about her love of nature set to be published in 2025.

National Post
calevesque@postmedia.com

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